How Much of My Motivation Is Really Mine?

I like positive feedback. That is precisely why I want to know what my life would look like if nobody else could see it.

Tauri Laane Facebook archive About 2 min read

I was thinking of writing about the surprises of the past year... Tristan’s extroversion, Tormi’s English, the respect I have developed for Mooni and Tuuli, my inner goals and my material circumstances.

But I will not. Over the past few months, I have increasingly noticed how many things I actually do because of other people or under their influence. HOW differently would I live if there were no other people?

And this is one example: telling someone about progress in my life and receiving the response, “Oh, cool!” I have to admit that I LIKE that answer. Which raises the question: how much of my motivation comes from wanting positive feedback from others?

Right now, I feel like a birch tree bending in the wind. If other people did not influence me, what would life be like? Who would I really be? So here is the first experiment: I will try to learn to live without telling anyone my “cool news” or about the progress in my life. I will do the things I want to do, but I will not talk about my progress.

One day, I believe, my roots will be deep in the ground and I will sense more clearly which things I do because I want them MYSELF and where I feel the influence of OTHER people. Until that day... until I write again!