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Awaken Your Inner Fan
Pressure does not create what spills out of a person. It reveals what was already inside — the critic or the fan.
What happens when we squeeze an orange? Juice flows out. But what if someone else squeezes it instead of us? Or a third person steps on it? Juice still sprays out — no matter who applies the pressure. And WHY? Simple — because the juice is inside the orange.
The next time someone criticises us, we could remember this. We tend to take everything personally, but... if you pay attention, a person who belittles us usually belittles others too. Belittling criticism often also says something about the speaker’s habits and inner state.
Criticism directed at us is not inherently bad. If it contains truth, wonderful — we can correct ourselves in the future, thank you! If, after checking it honestly, there seems to be nothing useful in it, we can calmly set it aside.
And when we want to criticise someone ourselves... it is a double-edged sword. Do we truly want to cultivate an inner critic that will turn on us without blinking? We do not. I would suggest locking it in the cellar for a long time, but it would eat the winter potato supply too. Better to have it move out altogether.
Instead of an inner critic, we could cultivate an inner FAN. 😉 How? To become strong and vigorous, it should train a lot — on the people close to us! Let it cheer every tiny success of our family and friends like a proper football fanatic supporting the home club. Let it praise and celebrate them... And sooner or later, all of that will “turn” in our direction too — our inner fan will begin to adore us as well. 😉